Star Trek has always been about more than just exploring strange new worlds; sometimes, it’s about the games we play. I remember watching Sisko on Deep Space Nine, clinging to his love of baseball as if it were a lifeline to Earth. This week’s Starfleet Academy gave us Calica, a reminder that even in the 23rd century, people need to blow off steam—let’s take a look at the fictional sports that have kept the galaxy entertained.
<h2>Calica</h2>
Whenever my friends and I play laser tag, someone always takes it way too seriously. Calica, introduced in <em>Starfleet Academy</em>, is like that, but with official rules and academy endorsement. It’s a mascot-defense shootout using modified phasers that temporarily transport opponents out of the game; teams score points by hitting a target defended by someone in a costume.
<h2>Geskana</h2>
I once tried to play lacrosse, and let's just say my hand-eye coordination was not up to par. In the <em>Enterprise</em> episode “Desert Crossing,” Archer and Tucker briefly engage in Geskana, a sport played by Zobral’s clan. Think lacrosse, but with smaller goals and, for some reason, more shirtlessness.
<h2>Vajhaq</h2>
It's funny how often shows create entire worlds, only to mention some details once and then forget about them forever. <em>Deep Space Nine</em> gave us Vajhaq, a ball-based game from the planet Meridian. Sisko, surprisingly, passed on the opportunity to play, which seems odd considering his passion for baseball.
<h3>Why Doesn't Sisko Play Vajhaq?</h3>
Perhaps Sisko sensed that Vajhaq, despite its ball-based nature, lacked the strategic depth he cherished in baseball, or maybe he was just saving his energy for the holosuite.
<h2>Tsunkatse</h2>
Every so often, combat sports manage to cut through the noise and enter mainstream culture. Tsunkatse, featured in <em>Star Trek: Voyager</em>, is essentially professional wrestling with a futuristic twist—fighters wear stun disruptors and battle in an arena surrounded by charged panels. Adding to the spectacle, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson himself made an appearance in one memorable episode. Matches range from knockouts to, potentially, death battles.
<h2>Pan Zan</h2>
Another blink-and-you’ll-miss-it sport from <em>Enterprise</em>, Pan Zan is an Enolian game that apparently resembles water polo.
<h2>Springball</h2>
I've always been fascinated by Jai Alai; the speed and precision are incredible. Springball, a popular Bajoran sport, bears a resemblance to Jai Alai. Two players compete to hit a target on a walled court, with a surprising amount of physical contact allowed. Interestingly, Major Kira was said to own a springball racquet in <em>DS9</em>, leading to some confusion in <em>Lower Decks</em> where a game of springball looked suspiciously like racquetball.
<h2>Pala</h2>
In <em>Voyager</em>, the Brunali field sport Pala gets a brief mention when Icheb, an ex-Borg, has the option to return to his homeworld and play again. Unfortunately, we never get to see it in action.
<h2>Velocity</h2>
When I was a kid, we invented a game using frisbees and some pretty questionable rules; Velocity sounds like something similar. This phaser-based sport involves two players hitting a disc back and forth, scoring points when the other player fails to stop it from hitting their body. It seems to exist primarily within holodecks, leaving it ambiguous whether it's purely holographic or playable in the real world.
<h2>Karo-Net</h2>
Sometimes, the most intriguing things are those we know the least about. All we know about Karo-Net is that Odo mentions it in passing while lamenting relationship compromises to Quark. Given Odo’s background, it's likely a Bajoran sport, or perhaps one popularized by the Cardassians during their occupation.
<h2>Anbo-jyutsu</h2>
Martial arts provide a sense of discipline and focus, and they have been interpreted in a variety of ways for entertainment purposes. Though Anbo-jyutsu isn't depicted in a professional setting, this Japanese-influenced martial art seems to be a major combat sport by the 24th century. Players duel one-on-one in a small arena, wearing light armor and visors that limit their sight, and they rely on proximity sensors in their staffs to locate their opponents.
<h2>The Octran Fertility Contest</h2>
Another passing reference from <em>Enterprise</em>, this contest is described by Phlox as similar to basketball. The "fertility" aspect apparently involves playing with minimal clothing.
<h2>Hoverball</h2>
I have fond memories of playing catch with my grandfather; a simple game can be a powerful connection. In <em>TNG</em>’s “Captain’s Holiday,” Picard’s vacation is interrupted by a floating anti-grav device used for Hoverball. The sport seems quite popular, with senior staff on <em>Voyager</em> often playing it on the holodeck.
<h2>Hydrosailing</h2>
A maritime sport only briefly mentioned when Kes takes holographic lessons in it on <em>Voyager</em>. Tuvok declines the offer to learn, stating that Vulcans don’t hydrosail, though whether this is cultural or just Tuvok being Tuvok is not specified.
<h2>Parrises Squares</h2>
<em>Star Trek</em> seems to love introducing sports that then vanish into the ether, never to be seen again. Parrises Squares, however, takes the cake. First mentioned in a <em>TNG</em> episode in 1988, it took <em>36 years</em> to actually appear onscreen in <em>Prodigy</em>. This dangerous team sport involves using ion mallets to hit a ball into a goal on a grid-based court where each square can change height mid-game.
Could any of these fictional sports actually gain traction in the real world?